Say what?

So at his 5th birthday well-visit, my little boy failed his hearing test. I didn't think too much of it at the time. I mean seriously...his sister was singing Diego in his other ear, I think the boy next door was getting 45 shots into his eyeball, and I was talking on my cell phone to someone in a tunnel trying to secure a place for him in the summer camp. So when he couldn't hear the four "tones" in his ear, I really thought another try with less distraction would yield the necessary results.

But when we went back before the office opened with no sister, no cell, and no shots and we still failed...I started to freak out.

Google...not my friend in this case.

Degenerative hearing, developmental delays, sign language, surgery...and that was just the first 100 hits...I could go on and on and on (it has been nearly 2 months you see, and I haven't been blogging because I have been googling...it has been UGLY).

My friends tried to convince me that there was no hearing loss, that he was fine, that the test was just administered improperly, but I couldn't quite buy it. You know how when you stare at those pictures long enough and you see unicorns jumping out at you. Well I was seeing deaf unicorns.

When he didn't hear me ask him to make his bed...hearing loss.
When he didn't hear me ask him to take his dishes to the sink...hearing loss.
When he spoke WAY too loud at the pool...hearing loss.

So today we went to the otolaryngologist (it is a word...just google it!) to have him properly tested. I have never been so nervous in my life. I sat outside the room trying not to throw up on the nice 80 year old woman having her hearing aid fitted and resisting the urge to stick my ear up against the door to see if he was saying "beep" enough times. Finally, the audiologist came out and told me he was fine.

What a huge wave of relief. He can hear. I guess we always knew that. So I said my thank yous, paid my $16,000 copay to see a specialist and headed home.

And as I was driving home, I realized I forgot to ask a question, "if he can hear fine, then why can't he hear me when I ask him to make his bed and put his dishes away. And why does he always seem to be yelling at me?"

And then it dawned on me...seems I didn't need to go to a specialist to learn the answer to those questions. They were answered at the first visit...his 5 Year Old well-visit. Should have googled that and I would have saved myself some time and a mortgage payment.